Friday 5 May 2006

Pondering

Here are some questions that have been puzzling me this week:
  • Why is the weather lovely each day when we're at work, but it pisses with rain at the weekend when we want to go out, cut the grass, hang the washing on the line, etc?

  • Why am I able to get up in time to get to work for an early start (8am), but I always leave too late when I'm working the late shift (from 10am)?

  • Why do window-cleaners put their cards through the door, touting for business, but when you ask them to clean your windows they never show up?

  • Why are recruiment consultants deceitful, two-faced, workshy bastards?

3 comments:

Chris said...

Answers to your questions:

1. The weather fairy only works part-time his/her main job being a recruitment consultant.

2. This is a law of physics - the longer you have before you need to do something (like leave for work), the longer you take to actually do it.

3. Window cleaners prefer to spend their time strolling about in the sunshine putting cards through doors than actually doing any work. And if they DO turn up to do your windows, be warned, they're usually not very good.

4. Recruitment consultants are in their jobs because they are too useless to do anything else but think that they are god-sent heros.

Hope this helps.

Delmonti said...

1. I say we hunt and capture the weather fairy. Malicious bastard that it is. We could then hold her for ransom and demand more bank holidays and a getaway car with air conditioning to a destination our our choice.

2. It's the word "late" thats putting you off... take a leaf from the Americans and call it a "brunch" start and you'll turn up on time.

3. Use Apple instead, they dont have windows.

4. I simply cant think of anything witty to say about recruitment consultants. or undertakers....



Clowns are funny tho'

chux said...

1. Its divine toture to keep us in our places. Obviously you are back sinner and we all pay the consequences of your behaviour.

2. I suffer with this one too. I think there is a bed troll that gets its claws into you and wont let you go if you hang around for too long.

3. They are too busy drinking tea down the caf

4. Recruitment consultants are the greedy offspring of Satan, who's only purpose in life is sucking the blood out of people rather than giving any value for your money.