Monday 31 October 2005

The Man on the Clapped-Out Omnibus

So, our "government" is thinking about banning drinking on buses and trains.

Why?

I'm not a big public drinker myself. I prefer a foaming pint of warm, nutty ale, hand-pulled from a pump, in a snug bar with horse-brasses on the wall. Served, preferrably, by an attractive barmaid, with large breasts in a low-cut t-shirt. "Will there be anything else, Sir?", she asks, as she leans over and licks her lips. "Perhaps I could tempt you to a quick nibble?"...

Ahem!

Errr... Where was I?

Oh, yes, drinking on public transport.

I'm not sure what the problem is. Presumably some of Tony Blair's blue-rinsed brigade have complained about "anti-social behaviour" (forget poverty/disease/homelessness, etc - wiping out bad manners is what really counts to our so-called superiors).


So rather than use existing rules, regulations and laws to simply boot people off of trains and buses if they get drunk and make a nuisance of themselves, we turn, instead, to preventing ordinary law-abiding folk from having one or two cans of over-priced beer (or a small bottle of wine) from the buffet car while they have to stand while making the 4 or 5 hour journey from London to Birmingham (via Inverness, due to track works at Exeter).

That's the UK government. Thinking of our health and well-being once more.

In the meantime, they can't even ban smoking in ANY public places.

I used to smoke. I gave up 18 months ago. But even when I was a smoker, I still supported a ban on public smoking. Because smoking harms others.

I defend anyone's right to harm themselves with booze, smoke, drugs, bungee-jumping or teasing large dogs. As long as you pay your National Insurance, you've paid for doctors to try to make you better again. But if it harms other people, we should stop it.

So, well done Tony. Banning drinking the odd can on a bus or train - which doesn't harm anyone; while lacking the balls/backbone to ban smoking in pubs or restaurants - which probably kills several thousand people each year.

Doesn't it make you proud?

3 comments:

meljoy said...

so they are trying to americanize ya'll?

We have an "open bottle" law, so even if you are outside and have it covered, if there is not top on it, you can get in trouble. You aren't supposed to haveit our of your bag.

We have "public intoxication" laws, which means if you're drunk in public, you can also get in trouble.

We have a smoking ban, you are not allowed to smoke indoors in any building. Unless it's your house (same goes for the drinking, you can drink in your house, or a place that has a liquor license).

They are shooting for a "no smoking in bars" law, which may or may not get passed. I actually don't mind smokers, I just mind breathing it in. I don't think it should be banned from bars though.

You can almost expect that if you're going to drink at a bar, you are going to breathe in faulty air, duh. If you don't wanna suck it into your lungs, don't go. right?

-mel

jomoore said...

Well yes, it's not actually the drinking that's the problem. It's the nasty drunk people who are trying to get home after spending 16 straight hours drinking in the pub. I know - let's change the licensing laws so people can spend even longer in the pub so they can get even drunker! That way, they'll be lucky to find their way to the station, let alone get on a train and bother all the sober citizens. Hurrah!

Clearly, the answer to preventing anti-social behaviour is to have laws against being drunk and disorderly. That'll do it.

Can we also have laws against being smelly, and leaning on people, and being sick in the gutter, and dancing very badly, and snogging people you don't know, and saying "I love you, mate" to your best friend?

Regarding smoking, I have no strong feelings either way. I used to be a passive smoker, until my friends gave up. I just had to go cold turkey. People can be so selfish.

Chris said...

Bring in prohibition I say (for booze AND fags).......

Seriously though, I DO wish that people were generally more considerate these days and that if you have to travel on public transport after an enjoyable evening out you didn't have to climb over unconscious vomit-smeared drunks to get off the bus/train, but, hey, I'm just a grumpy old woman!!