Tuesday, 21 August 2007

Number Ones: Part 4 - The Nineties

As I'm forty-one years old in a few days (you can see my Amazon Wishlist if you want to buy me a pressie!) I thought I'd take a look back at the songs which were number one in the UK chart each year on my birthday.

Today it's the turn of the 1990's.

This is the decade when, I'm afraid, the singles chart became more or less irrelevant. I've been wracking my memory to recall the last single I bought. it was either "The Race" by Yello or "Headlights On The Parade" by the Blue Nile. And I think they were both in around 1989 or 1990. Since then it's been albums all the way for me. And mostly on CD. I still haven't got around to buying downloads. I think I prefer to have a real "thing" to own, rather than an intangible set of bits and bytes sitting around on my hard-drive.

Right - let's see what the decade had to offer. What tasty morsels did the British music industry serve me up on my birthdays?

Bombalurina with Timmy Mallett - "Itsy Bitsy Teenie Weenie Yellow Polka Dot Bikini"
August 19 for 3 weeks

Argh! No!

Bryan Adams - "(Everything I Do) I Do It For You"
July 7 for 16 weeks

Crikey. That's just as bad.

Snap! - "Rhythm is a Dancer"
August 2 for 6 weeks

Oh, for heaven's sake...

Culture Beat - "Mr Vain"
August 22 for 4 weeks

What? What? Am I going to go the whole decade without a decent song at No.1 on my birthday...?

Wet Wet Wet - "Love Is All Around"
May 29 for 15 weeks

Flipping 'eck. It gets worse!

Blur - "Country House"
August 20 for 2 weeks

Phew! Finally. OK, it's not one of their best, but those lovable pretend cockneys from the posh bit of Essex at least won the "Britpop battle for number one" and stopped those naughty Northern monkeys from Oasis from being no.1 on my birthday.

Spice Girls - "Wannabe"
July 21 for 7 weeks

Now, stop it. A brief respite and now you're off again. I can't believe I actually thought that Posh was the sexy one back then...

Will Smith - "Men in Black"
August 10 for 4 weeks

The Fresh Prince gets totally fresh on some alien butt. Loses musical credibility in the process (if he ever had any... Yeah, "Summertime" was great).

Boyzone - "No Matter What"
August 9 for 3 weeks

Boyzone. Please, please just stop it. Stop it now!

Geri Halliwell - "Mi Chico Latino"
August 22 for 1 week

Right - that's it. Hang on. Which song was this? The only Geri solo number I remember is the one where she was very lithe and toned and rolling around in a speedboat. There might have been dwarves chasing her... Then again, that might just have been my sordid fantasy. Ah, poor Geri. Rubbish songs, but she was quite sexy for a couple of months, until she got too thin.

Is that it? The 1990's are over? Thank heavens. Will the new decade bring any decent new music?


Chris said...

If you ask me the '90s was a rubbish decade for all sorts of things, with some possible small exceptions). Music, New Labour, fashion, film, art, etc., etc. Your list sums it up.

jomoore said...

It was definitely the decade of the power ballad. How did you manage to avoid any Whitney Houston - wasn't she number one for most of decade?

Clare said...

I remember all of these songs (I didn't remember most of the 80s ones...) and I fear that the noughties (is that what they call it??) will not show any improvement in people's musical tastes!

MaryB said...

OK. First, Happy Birthday (at whatever future date it is). Second, after following your list of No. 1 birthday songs through the decades, seems you peaked rather early in the Sixties, eh? How ya' gonna beat Eleanor Rigby or Honky Tonk Woman? Lord, having to relive the 80's and 90's was just PAINFUL! Aargh! Let's move on, shall we? And, um, Happy Birthday, as I said earlier.

simplythe90's said...

wo wo hang on a mo, whats with everyone saying the 90's were rubbish. Majority of the people i know including myself believe the 80's is the worst of music in the 20th century! the 90's is one of the best, thats when the brit pop era came about, oasis, ocean colour scene. Did any of you listen to 90's music. One of my personal favourites is ocean colur scenes day we caught the train listen to that and say the 90's were rubbish.

PT said...

Dear "Simply",

If you actually READ my post you'll see that it was 10 particular records (the no.1s on my birthdays) which I criticised.

And anyway - even if I was criticising ALL 90s music (which I wasn't), it's MY blog. MY personal opinion. Writing comments to criticise my own personal opinion is completely pointless.

I'm guessing you were probably born in the 1970s, which is why you think that 1990s music is the best. I was born in the 1960s and I prefer 80s music.

This is how it ever was. People who love today's insipid chart rubbish were born in the 1990s and they probably think that all music produced before then was rubbish too.