Friday, 7 April 2006

Sadness & Guilt

My Nan's in hospital. Very ill. My Dad rang earlier because the doctors don't think she will last more than two or three more days.

She's been there 3 or 4 or 5 weeks - originally just a 'bad back', but that turned into a kidney problem and then they had her in a cardiac monitoring unit.

That was at least 2 weeks ago (or was it 3 - shit, the time goes past too quickly) and now I feel guilty as fuck. I was supposed to visit her the other week and I didn't make the time to do it.

After that, I thought she'd come out and was getting better. I heard that my aunt and uncle were around and the plan was to take Nan down to their home in Gloucestershire.

But I obviously got that wrong. And I never asked how she was. And nobody told me she was still in Kingston Hospital, deteriorating.


I hate sickness and death and hospitals, but I know I should do my duty and I will go and visit her tomorrow after work and I can only hope that it's not too late.

I love you Nan.

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